Dex

It's been a while since I blog.

Life has pretty much been a huge roller coaster ride for me lately. But I'm glad things are toning down and hopefully I'll be in a saner place soon cause it seems like my mind is my worst enemy now.

I just want some peace up there.

Today I went to Genting with the fam :) It was funner than expected.

My moods have been really messed up. I think right now I just need to sit in a corner with my Ipod and just blank out for abit. I've been walking around daydreaming, as in while I'm walking my mind is dreaming about something else. That means that I'm distracting myself from thinking about something or someone. It's a really bad habit, I'd space all the time even when I'm talking to someone and I do it everywhere regardless of the amount of people present. It's really unhealthy. I need to deal with reality.
Besides the Genting trip something super extra ordinary happened today.

Dex called.

Dex was this guy i had a major crush on back on the day. He was the typical guy I'd fall for. Melancholic, a lil bit akward, tortured and undefinable. He also plays the guitar. He had eyes that could I swear melted you when he look at you. It was this bluish greyish colour that was so defined cause he dyed his hair a darker colour than what he naturally had. Whenever I talk to him before I just couldn't look at him in the eye because I knew I would panic or stutter , so I'd avoid any or all eye contact with him. Finally one day, he came up to me and asked me " so are u always so akward when you talk to people or only just me?". I was stunt . He just laughed. So we became friends and I discovered he had a major awesome cd collection so I'd go over and listen to them and just chill. I think he was one of the only people that could ever get how i think and understand what i mean about things. I eventually got over my crush cause we were just too close

Anyways, the reason why him calling was such an extra ordinary event was because what happened the last time we meet up to hang. I was on my sem break and was back home. I was over at his place catching up with him.... Well, actually i was just ranting about how dramatic college was for me. He just listened. Then he said "I guess this is where the alcohol comes in" and he brought out the bottles. His friends came over and we started playing drinking games and then started to challenge each other to take shots. I woke up the next day with a major headache and a blank mind. The first thing out of my mouth was "SHIT!"... I was trying to remember what happened but then all I could remember was laughing at Dex and calling him lame. He was asleep beside me. He was like dead. So I went to the kitchen to get water and racking my brain trying to remember. Then like a burst of lighting, it hit me. I suddenly remembered something..... At that point all I could say was shit shit shit.... Why!....
I'm an akward person by nature.

When he woke up, I couldn't even look at him. I just watch tv. I of course tried my best to act normal but failed. I couldn't talk to him. So there was just silence. Finally, I guess he got pissed and he came up to me and said "only talk to me when your ready to talk about it".. After that i went home cause I was angry at the fact he said that and why should i start the topic. I know i have major ego issues. I don't really open up much..... Yeah so pretty much after that I avoided him...

When he called i didn't know if I should pick up. But i decided to suck it up and just pick up. We talked for like hours. And then he asked to meet up... I of course dying to see those eyes of his said yes.Then we joked about how I'd make things akward .... Before putting down the phone he said " I think you've had enough time to get ready"... I panic and put down the phone.

Smart move Debra

Ahhhh.. Just bite me already. Yeah so that's pretty much it. I now have to text him sorry for putting down the phone on you which I've typed out but haven't sent.

I really do alot of embarrassing things in my life but this is on the top of my most embarrassing moment list